Politics: You, the people, expect more from your representatives

As Finland's Municipal Elections are just few months away I find myself  being involved with it..

In the spirit of Stoic philosophy I do not concern myself with my paltry chances of actually becoming elected; in the end I have very little control over the matter. However, as an official candidate for a political party I am granted a voice and an opportunity to use it to appeal to the people: expect more from those who would become your representatives!

Demand your representatives to rise above partisan politics and to work for the common good of the whole society and not just for their personal gratification, party politics and various interest groups.

Demand your representatives to stand for the matters that unite us as a society instead of taking the low road by riding on issues of bigotry and hate, fear and suspicion, greed and envy, and all those other matters that would divide us and drive us all apart.

You, the people, must demand that those who ask for the power to influence your lives prove themselves to be worthy of your trust and respect. Demand that the people of influence and power within the society are to be held against higher standard!

Never let them forget that a government, be it local or national, serves at the pleasure of the people. Be not afraid to rise up and challenge all those who would argue that transparency, personal integrity, professionalism and careful consideration of all matters before decision should not be expected at all times in politics.

Challenge your canditates! Let them know that you expect them to be and to know better.  The people have a voice and when it is focused it is powerful and it will be heard.

Stoicism: Know your purpose

"Let all your efforts be directed to something, let it keep that end in view. It's not activity that disturbs people, but false conceptions of things that drive them mad."

Seneca: On Tranquility of Mind, 12.5

The singular truth is that one must have a purpose not just in action but also in life.

As I look back at my life so far, it is now obvious to me that one major contributor to the developmet of my depression and anxiety was the feeling that I have no purpose in life. Why would or should something exist that has no purpose?

In nature all things that exist have a purpose, a meaning, so to feel that one has no purpose is to feel that one's existance has no meaning. As mental places go, this is a bad one to be in. When I began to count the time I've lived alone in years instead of in weeks or months, it became increasingly difficult to think that my existence bears any social relevance. My professional life had me feeling the same for even a longer time. Ultimately the feeling of being without a purpose and meaning expanded to cover most of how I viewed my life to the point that for quite some time my only real goal in life was just to live a longer than my dog as I felt that she was the only being that still honestly needed me and by that extension, gave some purpose and meaning for my life.

Since I was a teenager, I have looked for other people to give me sense of purpose, meaning and validation: if I was useful to someone, I felt I had meaning. If someone needed me, I felt I had meaning. The more my professional work benefitted the people (and not just my employer), the greater was my sense of meaning. When the sense of meaning began to fade, I began to lose myself. Never completely, though. I still had friends and family, and I did have my work and my dog, so I had things in my life that kept me more or less grounded, but as I could not explain to myself what was my purpose I kept spiraling deeper into my depression and anxiety.

Was I truly without a purpose in life? Other people might disagree with me, and there were people who did their best to be there for me, but in the end it is all about how one deep down feels about the matter; it is one thing tell someone where to go, but actually getting there is completely different set of challenges.

As I'm writing this I cannot say with much confidence that I have found some or any purpose on any aspect of my life, and neither am I sure writing this block would qualify as one either. (There is an important distinction that I think should be noted here: it is one thing to ask if writing this blog is giving me any sense of purpose, and completely different thing to ask if I'm writing this blog with a sense of purpose. More on that a little later*.)

I think I chose to follow a different, if somewhat parallel path when I found meaning in stoic philosopy. As I mentioned, for much of my life I've relied on other people to have a sense purpose and meaning - to feel relevant - but ultimately that is something that is out of my control: I can make myself available in various ways, but I cannot make other people to see any value in me. The only thing I can have control over is how I allow my feelings on the matter influence my behavior, and to accept matters of life as they are.

I know not why or how this realisation gave me any peace of mind, but by doing so it opened a door for me that in a way allowed me to take a step outside and view myself from a different point of observation; to find a healthier perspective, in a manner of speaking, by accepting that I have ultimately very little influence over what value people would see in me, and to be at peace with notion. What is more, I know (at least rationally if not always emotionally) there are people who are willing to help me to find my way, but there is not much they can do about it until I find my way to a mental place where I can see things as they are as opposed to have I feel them to be: one may feel that one has no purpose or meaning, but it does not mean that it is truly so.

So.

In all honesty I know not where to go from here, but for some reason I do feel some measure of confidence that I might find my way to... somewhere, where I might feel again that I'm needed and that my actions are serving a purpose I can find worthy. It is much like my favourite quote from Douglas Adams:

"I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I ended up where I needed to be."

This does not mean that I won't feel the need to receive validation from other people, and to feel to be needed and appreciated, but now at least (at least for now) I'm at peace with the fact that this is (mostly) beyond my control, and that I'm more likely to find some measure of satisfaction by focusing my time and energy on matters that I do have influence over.

 *One such thing is this blog of mine. While I wield it mainly as a tool for introspection, it might also offer some perspective for others who are facing similar issues; if some one can find some meaning from these words, I would be glad, but I'm going to be fine even if no one does.

The thing is, while one must have a purpose not just in action but also in life, one must find it from within instead of from without: to not just know why or what one is doing, but also have the innate confidence that it is worth doing.

Stoicism: The guiding principles

"All you need are these: certainty of judgement in the present moment; action for the common good in the present moment; and an attitude of gratitude in the present moment for anything that comes your way,"

Marcus Aurelius: Meditations, 9.6

While one could take these words as such as they are, I'd like to think they have a deeper meaning - especially when one keeps in mind who Marcus Aurelius was.

As a general and an emperor he had to appear strong, confident and unhesitating when making decisions, and not just for the benefit of his followers but also in regard of his enemies: followers looked up to him for guidance and direction whereas his enemies would have been quick to exploit any apparent weakness.

"Fake it 'till you make it" is a good advice, but the truth is that confidence and strength are something that cannot be faked for very long at the times of continuous stress until one breaks under the pressure. I believe that strength and confidence flow from self-knowledge: from understanding and accepting not just one's abilities but also one's limitations, and by being true to self instead of trying to force something that does not come to naturally.

Marcus Aurelius was one of the great rulers in history of humanity; the very example of an enlightened dictator. No doubt his call for "action for the common good in the present moment" had something to do with this...

This is how we all should act at all times, I believe.

The last line is certainly the most difficult one to accept if not to understand: so much happens in life that people would struggle to face with "an attitude of gratitude in the present moment".

But if one takes a step back it might be easier to remember that failures are usually opportunities for learning while times of hardship are what reveals what kind of persons we are at the core. And even if one would reject this interpretation one might still agree that 'tis better to remain calm and composed when facing hardships as excess emotions are only likely to lead to overreactions.

And on those rare moments when something good come our way in the present moment, one would do well to maintain an attitude of gratitude instead of allowing oneself to feel entitled, gleeful or smug.

Stoicism: Limits of Influence

"How many have laid waste to your life when you weren't aware of what you were losing, how much was wasted in pointless grief, foolish joy, greedy desire, and social amusements - how little of your own was left to you. You will realize you were dying before your time!"

Seneca: On the Brevity of Life, 3.3b

I have written about how my depression and anxiety has occasionally given me hard time and indeed, it crippled me for a good part of the last year. I wasted months of my life while lying on the couch, watching TV and trying to get a grip over feelings of despair, hopelessness, loneliness, irrelevance, futility, and gods know what else: I felt like I was a ship in a dead water. My engines were running but I wasn't going anywhere and my rudder was unresponsive. 

Eventually I reached the point where I simply let go of most things and people in my life, many of which I had considered important to me. What little resources was still available to me I dedicated to doing my work, caring for my dog, and keeping my home in a livable condition, but that was about it for the most part and whatever remained I focused inward.

I was forced to to take account of what is truly important to me in my life, and what things are within the realm of my own control - and to understand which of those things were either one or the other, but not both. This was my first proper step to mental and emotional recovery, and into stoic philosophy.

It is not easy to let go of things and people in life, but it should also be understood that letting go does not necessarily mean that those things and people are lost in life - one should take note of those who understand and hold on to those who hold on to you, I believe. It is about understanding the limits of one's control over the things and people in life, and about how one chooses to respond to this understanding.

For example, I have very little influence over how people view me and regard me so how much energy and effort should I dedicate to such matters? Should I keep myself clean, groomed and well-dressed because I'm doing it all in hopes of improving the attitudes of other people towards me, or because it makes me feel better about myself? Should I make career choices based on whatever I think might advance me on the corporate and social ladder, or should I settle on doing things that I find personally interesting and meaningful, and doing it well because it is a matter of professional pride to me?

This is just one of the many possible points of observation, but I suppose it is as good as any to start with. I've spent energy on taking stand on political matters and mostly felt just frustration over it all because I liked to fool myself into thinking that occasional rants in Facebook and blogs might influence people's way of thinking. Sure, it might have with few individuals but nothing I've done has actually changed anything. These are matters that are beyond my control so why should I concern myself with them instead of focusing on things that I can actually influence? Despite all my feelings of resentment, anger and frustration towards social injustice, underhanded politics, corporate exploitation of those who cannot stand for themselves, and so many other things, what else have I ever achieved except open myself for depression and anxiety? By honestly taking account of what lies within my sphere of influence and by understanding how close to just me and my home those limits are, I have found some of the lost peace of mind.

For now, I live and write just for myself.

Stoicism: Only the educated are free

"What is the fruit of these teachings? Only the most beautiful and proper harvest of the truly educated - tranquility, fearlessness, and freedom. We should not trust the masses who say only the free can be educated, but rather the lovers of wisdom who say only the educated are free."

Epictetus: Discourses, 2.1.21-23a

About two millennia ago Epictetus was born a slave and received education only because his master allowed it for him. Only because of the education he received was Epictetus enabled to gain appreciation and eventually his freedom, and to become a teacher who's words would still be heard after two thousand years after his death.

Modern Western world has no slaves (at least, not in the traditional sense of the word), but one only needs to change the words "the free" to "the wealthy" and suddenly the words of Epictetus address a very real and concrete issue in most parts of the world: whereas education should be viewed as human right it is too often regarded as something only the wealthy are entitled to. In too many countries those born to poverty (if not to slavery) will never have an opportunity to receive education needed to become free - I mean, to rise above poverty.

Out of over six billion people living in this world I received a rare privilege to be raised in a small nation where education is free: my elementary school was free, my second degree education was (mostly) free, and my studies in Polytechnic University were also free. Because of this I was enabled to rise above the social status of my working class parents - and I say this not only with gratitude, but also with appreciation of the life my single parent mother was able to provide to me and my sister.

However, most of the people in the world do not have these kinds of opportunities for education. Instead they are forced to start the race of life with severe and debilitating handicaps. Even here in Finland many neoliberal politicians, who believe education should not be free but individuals should earn their right for it by paying for it, have managed to find their way into power by feeding on common feelings of resentment and envy followed by a decade of difficult economics. To this end education budgets and student support mechanisms have been severely crippled by the current and previous governments. The commonly used justification for these actions is that "our society cannot afford these kinds of social benefits", and "we must get the young people into working life sooner instead of having them spend years in schools", but these people are terribly and undeniably wrong.

No country can afford not to empower its citizens from utilising their full potential by limiting their opportunities for education and personal development. Least of all small countries such as Finland, where our only true national resource is the mental ability for innovations, and research and development. Politicians and businesses are calling for new goods and services to be exported, but without educated and motivated people working on research and development that cannot happen.

Additionally the national economy will never be improved by forcing the young people to begin their adult lives with huge debts that they are forced to pay for a decade if not longer instead of using their earnings to consume goods and services, and starting families. The only ones that will benefit from forcing students to take large loans are the banks and loan shark lenders, and there are business people who believe that their personal ability to make profit would be improved by creating a class of low income people with limited education and who are vulnerable for exploitation.

Again, they are all horribly wrong. While some individuals and private parties may benefit from a society that is crippled in this way, the nations must not be allowed to follow the will of these people as the only thing that is good for all the people and the society as whole is to enable all people to have the education they need and want to have, and to support cross-scientific research instead of limiting the educational options to those determined by the short-term corporate needs.

Remember Epictetus' words: only the educated are free!

Stoicism: A year long journey begins

"The chief task in life is simply this: to identify and separate matters so that I can say clearly to myself which are externals not under my control, and which have to do with the choices I actually control. Where then do I look for good and evil? Not to uncontrollable externals, but within myself to the choices that are my own..."

Epictetus: Discources, 2.5.4-5

I began writing about my arduous journey of dealing with my depression and anxiety a while back, but did not publish more on the matter after the first entry as the rest of the entries never did mature beyond drafts and good intentions. One reason for this is that while the Arduous Journey was for me to better understand the mechanisms of my depression, I've since then come to adopt another approach ,which is the one of stoic philosophy. The idea that while I may not have control over all things that happen to me in life, I do have control over my own reactions, resonates in a unique way with my attempt to climb above my depression and anxiety. I believe that this is the guiding principle that may eventually help me find my way out of this confusing maze of emotions.

To this end I bought myself a Christmas present, The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and Art of Living by Ryan Holiday. Each day I intend to walk in the footsteps of Epictetus, Seneca, Marcus Aurelius and the rest, and see what I can learn about myself and how to adjust to natural forces and influences in my life.

In addition I hope this will also help me to get back into my old habit of writing daily so it would once more become as natural and fluent as it once more was.

Here we go!